There comes an aching moment
when you realize you are truly alone.
No lover, no wedded one,
no long-term friend
no nurtured child
will be there when
you face your deepest despair.
It is then
that you collapse.
Grab yourself by the throat
raw and raging
disgusted, hating.
No one loves you. No one ever will.
And you shred your skin
as if scaling a fish.
Invoke self pain
to punish yourself
for mere existence.
For who on earth
would wish to live
an unloved life?
I went there,
to that place of no love.
Laid down my head
on an executioner’s block.
But he grabbed my skull.
Spun me dizzy
from dread.
Shocked me
into ecstasy.
Made me know I am whole
and need virtually no one
but that dear spirit who will escort me home.
